Finding the Gods

It was only when a guest asked me about my Mjolnir that I realized it had been 8 months since I first found myself entranced by the tales of the Norse gods and the culture of the people who followed them. I meant, late last year, to simply study the mythology of several ancient cultures for a broader understanding of the practices and gods of others. Somehow, when I got to the Norse, it was as though I couldn’t stop, and I developed an interest a whole lot deeper than I expected!

I’ve asked God (the Christian one) for a sign, for something, a handful of times in my life, typically in my most doubtful moments, only to be met with silence. I was a self-proclaimed atheist, but that didn’t mean that I did not at least wish that there was someone or something out there that was greater, beyond some generic, unknowable notion of a “higher power.” So when I made a small offering of drink to Freyr and lit a candle for him, I didn’t expect too much. I harbored but a drop of hope in a sea of skepticism.

But I believe that he answered me.

Now, I’m not one to put much faith in one-off occurrences, but Thor has since sent me signs as well. The most meaningful, to me, was just a couple nights ago, when I dreamt of carrying the Mjolnir symbol after spending the day pondering whether or not I should get a new, better-quality one to represent my budding belief in the old gods. And what should I wake to but thunder?

I’m not entirely concerned with strict reconstructionist practices, though I think that study of the lore and the culture absolutely has its place. I can’t really bring myself to care whether or not I’m “doing heathenry right” by the standards of other heathens. All I can seem to care about now is that someone heard my prayers.

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3 thoughts on “Finding the Gods

  1. My advice is don’t worry about doing heathenry “right”. It will absolutely destory you if you focus on pleasing people, especially in heathenry. The gods in my experience, absolutely do answer prayers and take an interest in people. You’re not going “crazy” and don’t let anyone take that experience away from you. Always use discernment of course… but just my advice and thoughts on the matter.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I appreciate your comment, Rowan! It’s pretty intimidating sometimes hearing from the Heathenry Police. Spirituality, in my opinion anyway, is something very personal that can’t really be confined to a hard set of rules, and it’s okay for people’s experiences to differ.

      Liked by 1 person

      • exactly. Honestly the “lore-keepers” you find on reddit or facebook suck the fucking heart and soul out of heathenry and it scared me off for a long time. I don’t want that to happen to you… the norse gods in my experience are amazing. A pain in the ass (I say that lovingly) but amazing none the less.

        They are family.

        Just remember it’s ok to be solitary and your practice is YOURS and no one else’s.

        Liked by 1 person

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